For some reason I can never understand, it is often considered lazy or unproductive to rest. This is unhelpful and old school thinking, especially when you consider that as survivors...

The known facts about being triggered are these: We don't know when they're going to occur, or how they will occur. This means is that we cannot prepare for that which we...

Many people consider that mind games are something that are done to us and that we are being manipulated by others. No one ever considers the bigger truth: we play...

The sex lives of survivors is rarely discussed. There are many reasons as to why, but it’s time to look at how the abuse impacted you. Sexual activity as an adult will...

To be honest when I think of people making New Year's resolutions I always silently shudder. To my mind, if you wanted to do something you would have already made...

Getting through Xmas, can be an overwhelming ask for us as Survivors. While many people experience joy and celebration during this time, we can feel the opposite through difficult emotions, painful...

As survivors of child sexual abuse, it is widely accepted that we were controlled through grooming whether it was manipulation, flattery, violence, or other ways, simply so the abuser could...

If you are deciding on how you wish to confront your abuser, please be aware that as emotions will be running at an all-time high, deciding something of this importance...

I dedicate this blog to Malcolm Richards. It’s almost unbelievable how difficult trying to get somewhere with your abuse can be. From hoping that people will understand what it is you have...

Ever wondered why you struggle with certain areas in your life? It could be when it comes to speaking out, or joining in, or having confidence, even feeling connected or even...

In the process of recovering from your abuse you will notice the impacts on you. Though these differ from survivor to survivor, there is one that is not often recognised, let...

Wanting your voice heard can sometimes be buried deep within, and therefore not always obvious, you were, after all, taught it wasn’t safe to use it. Probably, anytime you tried you...

Every survivor everywhere has been conditioned to believe that the sexual abuse they suffered as a child, was their fault. That they somehow ‘made it happen’, so if that is...

One of the hallmarks of being a survivor can come with the experience of not being believed. This appears in many forms but usually begins with Are you Sure? He or She...

Although this is well known to us as survivors and has been used against us in destructive and manipulative ways, were you aware, silence is available to you as a

As survivors if we are sharing what happened to us, some of us have this habit of justifying the truth when discussing with others. This has to stop. We need to

For some of us, feeling confident when dealing with powerful people just doesn’t happen. The fear, the paralysis can be so strong that even finding words is a struggle. This also has

Having your own back as a survivor is not without its challenges. WE are conditioned from the time our abuse began, to put our needs last and not value what our

What does it even mean, and where does it stem from? It sounds quite intellectual, but it’s not. It’s basically when we do things that block our success and prevent good things

If you talk to the average person about proud moments in their lives, chances are they could probably list a few. Part of being human you would have thought, the…

Is both humbling and inspiring, and not just for the person feeling it. When respectfully done, it feels significant and quite powerful. It comes highly recommended, has the X factor, and I

It’s almost impossible to be visible when a key part of our existence has been hiding in the dark. Being a survivor of child sexual abuse means that we become as unwelcome as the truth and when the words finally emerge, the reaction to it ensures we move further back into the shadows.

Feeling disappointed and then accepting it is one of life’s many challenges.

Commonly appearing as a person letting us down, or something we hadn’t anticipated, disappointment is part of who we are…

Is common to survivors and grew exponentially from the very first time we were abused.

We had no choice you see but to doubt ourselves, because we couldn’t afford to doubt the abuser. Why? Because we needed them.

I love everything about this: The words itself, thought of it, and the impact it has.I know when I’ve been in the company of it, because I feel humbled somehow and very blessed.

Self-love takes commitment and determination. It is challenging, misunderstood and completely underestimated in its power to change lives. Sounds like a massive statement – but one I stand by it.

I was asked recently how to stay positive when everything indicates feeling the opposite. When life feels like it’s just negative and certain people in it just don’t get you.

Sometimes for survivors, Xmas can feel traumatic, anxiety provoking and a sense of dread can descend. I know that for some of us, the worst of experiences occurred over this

Have you met yours yet? That voice inside your head that is never quite happy or satisfied with what you do? That endless monologue about how you should just do one

I recently read a book by Edith Eger called The Choice. It is inspirational, powerful and well worth reading. It got me to thinking that when you break it down